Safety comes before scoring.

Quick exit

Every page on this site carries a Quick exit link at the top. It leaves the site immediately. If someone can see your phone, use it rather than the back button.

What we never do

• We never notify the person you are discerning about. There is no invitation, no shared link, no partner view, and no way for them to request your results.
• We never email a Discernment Check result unless you ask us to, and you choose the address.
• We never publish, sell or share individual answers. Aggregated, anonymised data is used to build norms for African couples, and you can decline that when you take the assessment.
• We never score the other person. Our instruments measure what you can observe and how you are deciding, not a verdict on a named individual.

What happens when an answer raises concern

The safety questions in the Discernment Check have a threshold. If your answers cross it, you do not receive a Map or a score. You receive a short, calm page that says what you have described is not normal and not your fault, offers to connect you with a Guide trained for exactly this, and gives you a way to reach a real person by email or WhatsApp. Nothing is sent anywhere without your instruction, and nothing you answered is kept.

Contact us for help, or for more information. Write one line to hello@letstalkmarriage.app or WhatsApp us on +1 (980) 327-2341, and we will connect you with a Guide trained for this — or find you a local service if that is what you would rather have. You do not have to explain anything.

Our Guides

Every certified Guide completes an examined safeguarding module before they can debrief anybody. It covers recognising coercive control, the difference between conflict and abuse, what to do when a report raises a flag, how to refer, and what never to say to someone who has just told the truth for the first time. Guides are required to refer rather than manage cases beyond their competence, and a Guide may not debrief a couple they are personally entangled with.

The Guide’s edition of a couple’s report flags specific concerns — coercion, addiction, undisclosed debt, an undisclosed child or a prior marriage — and each flag carries a written escalation protocol rather than a suggestion.

Your data

Your answers never leave your device and are never stored by us — there is nothing on our servers to breach or to demand. What we may hold, if you chose to share it, is your email address and a summary score. You can ask us to delete that at any time by writing to hello@letstalkmarriage.app, and we will confirm in writing when it is done. Full detail is on the privacy page.

Children

Our assessments are for adults. We do not knowingly collect information from anyone under eighteen. Where a report indicates a child may be at risk, our Guides are instructed to follow local mandatory reporting law, and this overrides confidentiality.

Telling us we got it wrong

If a Guide has behaved badly, or a report caused harm, write to hello@letstalkmarriage.app with the word safeguarding in the subject line. A named person reviews every such message, certification can be withdrawn, and we will tell you what we did.